Dating in Miami? More like Dating in High School

I was watching “House Hunters International”...yes I like that TV show. They were filming in Spain, and a 30ish guy was buying his first place.

He had so much money saved since he was living at home, I’m not sure if he even needed a mortgage. I’m sure it was because he banked all the money he spent on rent, groceries, laundry service, etc. That adds up to a lot of money from 21-29!!

I have a feeling Latins who date Latins don’t mind the other person living at home. I bet the Latin Mom even brings her son and his date breakfast in bed! I wouldn’t mind that!

Posted on 05/19/2009 at 6:56 PM

Great piece, Matt! Nice to see someone else’s perspective.  I would be *mortified* if I slept over a guy’s house with his parent’s in the same roof, even if he were my long-term boyfriend.

There is a real financial reason why this is done in Spain though or so my Spanish friends tell me—a) people just don’t make the same kind of salaries we make here and b) there is literally not enough real estate (for renting and buying) and what there is, is not readily affordable.

Another problem in Spain is employment.  College is free over there, and there is a surplus of white collar workers but a dearth of jobs.  Again, this is what I’ve been told whenever I’ve gone to Spain.

But in some ways, going to college, working your ass off to buy a place by the time you’re 30, and NOT getting married when you’re so young, is in fact a good idea, and that’s what the fortunate few tend to do.

All this aside, it’s also true that the sense of family ties is different in Hispanic culture.

I live with my parents now because of financial issues and because I need to save some cash.  If any man I would date doesn’t get that and appreciate me for the vastly wonderful and amazing woman that I am, that’s his problem.  But in my case it’s not a Cuban culture thing.  I would SO rather live on my own, as I did, for half of my adult life.

One thing you didn’t cover, Matt, is people WITH kids.  I recently dated a guy who had primary custody of his two daughters.  We had to find creative ways to get busy too.

Posted on 05/20/2009 at 10:21 AM

Yeah, I don’t know much about dating people with kids. I did it once, and the kid was gone for the summer so it was a non-issue.

But sungal, you do realize that his mom is doing shit like serving his every need, he’s going to expect YOU to do that too? Tell her, Maria….

Posted on 05/20/2009 at 6:28 PM

Perferred not to date latin women?! Excuse me, not all latin women are the same..If your Single matt, “Fortunately"it’s for a reason. not all of us have 10 kids and live with our parents. Yes some latin parents could be weird and perferred to have their kids bring over women are guys.Personally my parents would have never allowed that.But can you blame them. we’re living in Bad times, where There r drugs and crime out there. So u Want to keep close tabs on your kids.. Perhaps They should be more liberated like caucasins..and have their kids smoke weed and shoot up heroin and let them live more freely?! See how Ignorant that sounds.

Personally I have no problems with no race, we all take a dump the same way.  we all are susceptible to Deadly diseases so please Don’t catagorize Hispanics.

Posted on 05/20/2009 at 6:28 PM

bro, 5am is plenty of time to do the deed and get old girl back home!

Posted on 05/20/2009 at 6:54 PM

Oh man, I haven’t gotten into this one in a while….

We all have “types.” Some like tall, some like short, some like rail-thin, some like full-figured. My “type” is white, American, and typically blonde. That’s what I’m attracted to. Some of that is physical, a lot of it is cultural, but it is my preference.

This does not mean I look down on Latin women as people, rather I am not sexually attracted to the vast majority of them. That’s not a racial issue. It’s just my personal preference.

Posted on 05/20/2009 at 6:58 PM

Alright I really have to respond to Jessy.  Apart from you inability to spell and use correct grammar your assumptions are somewhat insane.  Yes Jessy “There R drugs and crime out there.”  But if a parent correctly raises his or her child by 18 that child should know how to make wise decisions.  Guess what?  I moved out of my house and across the country at 18 and I’m not a drug addict.  Nor are any of my other friends who also moved out at 18.  Just because you don’t keep your child under lock and key until she is married does not mean that she will come stumbling back to you one day knocked up with a needle in her arm. 

I also have “no problem with no race,” which for your future knowledge is actually correctly said “no problem with any race.”  If you look closely this isn’t a racial story but rather a cultural difference.  Matt is simply pointing out that those of us who do not come from a community that is mainly latin may not realize how common living at home is.  Where I grew up at 18 you left home for either college or a job. 

Yes there are many good reasons people live at home.  Some people have financial issues or they are in school or they have a family member who has medical problems and needs help. But the reasons your listed to be honest are EXACTLY what is wrong with the idea that parents must pressure their children to live at home.  As I said before if you raise your child correctly he or she should be able to make the right decisions.  At some point sheltering a “child” is more detrimental than helpful.  When someone is 29 years old and has never lived away from Mom and Dad that person is far behind the learning curve of life.

Posted on 05/20/2009 at 7:30 PM

Lauren, First off I was writing quickly and . this is not about “Spelling” I’m just pointing out The “fact” that it is very offensive for matt to say that he has a problem dating latin women..Fine it’s his personal preference. But I don’t know where you come off thinking that you are so high and mighty. Because you spell so perfectly ?? I’m trying to make a point. Because I just think it’s Ignorant and offensive for someone to say that’s why I Don’t Date Latin Women . Now I don’t have any children..And I’m not saying that all white parants are like that..If you listen carefully..you would see that I’m was trying to prove a point. As I could see you didn’t like Lauren.

So how do you think hispanics feel, When someone says I don’t like dating latin people?? Personally I think matt criticizes everything. Thats nothing new.

Hey maybe you like his views.
Since you possess such “Great Mental Capacity” I would think you know that I was joking around and trying to make a point. another problem you seem to have “lauren” is that you think your so intelligent by correcting a persons spelling..This is not an essay. So get a grip. Don’t bother writing back I assure you I won’t look at this again.

Posted on 05/20/2009 at 11:53 PM

Whoops! I spelled parent wrong. I also did a couple of other mistakes.
I’m so Sorry I couldn’t spelled well enough for you.
But it Hasn’t prevented me from being an oncology nurse and getting my Masters at Colombia university last year.

Posted on 05/21/2009 at 12:01 AM

It’s one thing to live at home and wholly another to have mom do your laundry.  That is lame-ass.  And you don’t go from mom to wife and expect the missy to clean up after you.  But that is not really so typical, at least not in my experience, though there is a certain macho expectation among *some* Latin men to expect women to be their maids.  There are also plenty of American men who treat women like dirt, so unfortunately, this can’t be pinned down to a particular culture.

Jessy, I happen to know Matt personally, and while he may come across as an a-hole ... I must say, I am hispanic and I did not take this article personally. He simply stated what turns him off, but he didn’t say something like “All hispanic woman suck and are horrible.”  He’s a gringo who moved to Miami and so even if you don’t agree, you still have to admit he has a right to his own perspective on things and his preferences. Read between the lines here—this article is clearly written by a “gringo” for “gringos” ... and we could just as easily write an article by “hispanics” for “hispanics” where we could have just as much reservations about this as anything else.

Posted on 05/21/2009 at 12:04 AM

Notice How I spelled Columbia wrong too. Maybe I did it Deliberately. and I also Put couldn’t “Spelled” instead of spell..Sorry..lol

Yes maria Your right he has a right to his perference. but That Lauren person really ticked me off. she wasn’t trying to figure the point I was trying to come across. It’s ok I’m not bothered by it anymore. I moved on. But I just needed to get that off my chest.

Posted on 05/21/2009 at 12:15 AM

Thank you Maria. You are are a great voice of modartion here. I always really appreciate your input.

Posted on 05/22/2009 at 3:36 PM

Yes. It’s really fantastic. Like in highschool, there are so many unforgettable moments happened. It’s also more like a Latin Dating

Posted on 08/21/2009 at 8:26 PM