Gilbert Stafford Memorial Celebrates Life of Iconic Doorman

If you do not know who Gilbert Stafford is - or was - then you clearly did not go out in Miami Beach in the 1990s and early 2000s. For the unaware, Gilbert was THE doorman on the Beach for almost a decade, guarding the velvet ropes with a combination of humor, attitude and compassion that every doorman could take a lesson from. Sadly, Gilbert passed away on New Year’s Day just before his 58th birthday. Three memorials were held in New York, Los Angeles and Miami to celebrate his life. The Miami version was Wednesday night at Mynt.

DROPPING GILBERT’S NAME FOR THE LAST TIME

It was rather ironic that at a memorial for a man who spent much of his life controlling the doors of America’s hottest nightclubs, all one needed to do was mention his name to be allowed past the usually-treacherous ropes at Mynt. Inside, the large video screens that usually show psychedelic videos were taken over by photos spanning Gilbert’s entire life. Some of him as a small child, some of him lounging poolside in bathing suits that were too small, even for a gay man. Even his High School yearbook photo made an appearance on the Mynt video screens, right next to countless pictures of him dressed up at bars, restaurants and guarding the doors.

The evening began as the crowd, a collection of the beautiful party people of that era all ten years older, caught up and remembered old times, both with Gilbert and without. The open bar helped many conversations along, and people pretended to recognize a lot of people they had long since forgotten. If nothing else, they all had memories of Gilbert. As one speaker at the memorial said “Everyone in here was his friend,” which was both hyperbole and completely accurate at the same time. If you recognized Gilbert, he would always at least pretend to recognize you. And usually, he would treat you like an old friend.  But if you ever got attitude with the man, he could make you feel two feet tall.

HE MADE YOU FEEL GOOD ABOUT NOT GETTING IN

The memorial was not overrun by long-winded speeches. In fact, only four speakers gave testimony during the night, one of which was his sister via a letter. His closest friends remembered both his giving nature and his ruthless judgment. Both qualities essential in any doorman. Gilbert was perhaps the only person who could tell you you weren’t getting in, but make you feel good about it at the same time. “His tongue could heal you, and his tongue could cut you down,” his sister’s letter said. A loud cheer erupted from the crowd on the floor.

Beyond the sentimental remembrances were also recollections of how Gilbert lived outside of work. Which, as a doorman in LA, New York and South Beach, was fast and furious. Every speaker spoke of Gilbert’s affinity for his “Pussy Boys,” a term I had never heard before. But I think we can all use our imagination and figure it out. His trademark Dewar’s and water was also a popular topic of discussion, and one speaker even talked about his ability to determine which pills were best to take at which time of the night. And you have to love a memorial where a topic like that is discussed lovingly.

Gilbert would have approved of this event.  It was both exclusive and all-inclusive at the same time. And though there were tears over the loss, everyone still seemed to have a good time. Though he was not a man I had the opportunity to meet on more than a few occasions when he wasn’t working, I still respected the work he did. And I wish that more contemporary doormen would mold themselves after Gilbert. There may never be another Gilbert Stafford, but his legacy should mold nightlife for decades to come.

Related Links: • Gilbert’s Memorial Deucers.com Related Categories: About the Author: Matt Meltzer is a featured columnist at Miami Beach 411. See more articles by Matt Meltzer. See more articles by Matt Meltzer Was This Post Helpful? Please Share It With Others! Tweet

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